I am giving myself 2 months to move on if everything fails this month.
You still have twenty five days to decide.
2014 should be dedicated to myself and to someone who truly deserves my time, attention, efforts and most of all, my heart.
I have learned to use pain as a reason to move on so I am going to use that if everything is still fucked up. But right now, the last 25 days, will be a challenge. A challenge to you and a challenge to me.
I ask myself that question over and over and over again but I think it is useless. I also think of holding on even if there is no hope at all. I want my happiness back. I want the old me back but I forgot how I was before you came. I know you are not the only source of my happiness but you are pretty much most of it. I try to remove you from my head by thinking of the pain I have experienced with you but I just can't. Thoughts of you haunt me in my sleep. Thoughts of you burns my heart with pain. I hug my pillow tight forcing myself to forget and ease the pain but I just can't. It has been three days since and I know it will take me a lot of time to move on. You see everything I do involves you. Everything I do I see you. I am in so much pain. I swear. I am still hoping but I know you are trying to forget me. So I will try to do the same. I will try. If I can't do it, I will cry.
I cry and pray to the Gods for them to give you to me.
You are my soulmate, my destiny and my only love.
I guess they are punishing me because obviously you are not with me.
I am hurting because you have made your decision.
I am hurting because I am left hanging.
I wish for an explanation.
:(
